What I Did on Martin Luther King Day
So, I woke up today at 10:50 am to go to my one class at 11:00. It was in the basement of the college chapel. When I got down there, I found that the door to the classroom was locked and also that no one was around. I was all alone. So, I sat around for about 10 minutes and still didn't see anyone come by. My first instinct was to assume that I was in one of those Twilight Zone episodes where the one guy goes about his normal routine to find that everyone around him has disappeared and he will end up either being an astronaut under hypnosis or a toy figure in a toy town. As it happened, I was neither.I went back to my room figuring that class must have been cancelled at the last minute and no one told me because they are all jerks. I also thought for a moment that my watch was wrong, and that I just missed class, but my watch said it was 2 pm when Kids in the Hall came on, and Kids in the Hall always comes on at 2 pm. So, to recap, I went to class on time, but there was no class. No explanation was given. I was miffed.
After Kids in the Hall, I went to the Post Office to mail a letter but the Post Office was closed. At 3 pm no less. Lazy Postmen, you don't clock out until 5. I will report you to the Post Master's General, and he will show you no mercy.
At that point, I realized that because it is Martin Luther King Day, classes and everything must have closed down to celebrate this. Which is odd to me, because I always had school on that day before I went to college. That may partly be because few black people lived in my town, Keepoutnigger, Michigan. But the main reason we had school on Martin Luther King Day is because we had school almost every day of the year. The people who ran my school district never closed school unless they were forced to by federal law. Every year, they tacked on another school day to the year until there will be more school days in a school year than in a calendar year, and kids will not be able to graduate high school until they are well past 40. Also, they never cancelled school for a snow day, even on days when every school district surrounding us cancelled school and the only way you could get into town was to hitch your dog onto a sled, or get a piggy back ride from Sasquatch, who lived in the woods outside my house, because there was so much fucking snow. But the people who ran my school didn’t care, they would have tried to get us to go to school in the summer if we hadn’t all ran out into the woods to hide from them at the start of June. They came after us with nets and tranquilizer guns but only managed to capture the stupid kids.
So now I go to college far away from my hometown, and I go to a school that closes for Martin Luther King Day. I will have to get used to this grand celebration of Black Power.
This picture came up when I typed in "Black Power" into Google Image Search. The Black Power Ranger is the ultimate symbol of Black Power. He is a black man dressed in black and fueled by the power of Black Rage. When the White Ranger was added to the show and made the leader of the Power Rangers, the Black Ranger should have struck out on his own instead of submitting to the Cracker Ranger. He could have formed a new African Super Team with Black Vulcan, Dolemite, Lando Calrissian, and Mr. T. That team is so cool, just thinking about it made me mess my pants.
