The Web BtC

The Epic Slash Poem

Slash, the greatest rock musician ever, has gone far too long without proper recognition. That is why I took the responsibility for writing a series of haikus describing Slash. It is sort of in chronologically in order from his humble beginnings to his current career. Some day in the future my poems will have been discovered and a future teacher will be explaining to her class what experts think it’s about, and some kid will say "I think its about a kick ass guitar player." And the teacher will say "No Slash is a metaphor for love and guitar is a metaphor for ass." Then my ghost will come down from the ceiling with the ghost of Slash. Then I shall tell the class "I was in heaven and I heard this women say I love ass, well she’s right, I love KICKING ASS." Then me and Slash will take her out. Then the Ghostbusters will break down the door, but it won’t be good because in the future the Ghostbusters are evil. But they won’t be enough to stop me and Slash, not even close. Here are the haikus.

Nice Hat
Look at all that hair
It’s wild and out of control
Better wear a hat

Rock and Roll
Listen to that manic wail
He is one with the guitar
A modern day Hendrix

Cool Motherfucker
Slash’s look is unique
He has big hair and a hat
And is always smoking

Look out Slash is here
He will rock out all night long
Be careful my friend

November Rain
Get out of that church
Grab that guitar and rock out
Screw Axl he’s a loser

I hear a wild party
Slash must be someplace in town
Let us all rejoice

Slash in November Rain
Axl Sucks
Axl stormed off stage
But Slash did not go with him
He lives for the music

November Rain 2
Slash will you play the
Solo from November Rain
That song is awesome

Slash is Awesome
Up in heaven Jesus
Was asked who he likes the most
Of course he said Slash

Sweet Farewells
Slash and Axl often fought
He left and formed Slash’s Snakepit
It failed horribly

Axl Still Sucks
Axl refuses to let
Slash in the New Guns N Roses
This makes Slash sad

Axl Sucks
Kid Notorious
Slash needed some more cash
So he appeared in a cartoon
It was soon cancelled

Slash has joined a band
Named Velvet Revolver, he
Hopes it makes money

Velvet Revolver
Is coming to a town near you
Rock has been reborn

Velvet Revolver