Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Tournament Fighters Guide

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Fuck you Splinter, maybe I don't feel like playing this shitty game anymore. What's the deal with your dialogue box anyways? I can barely read that shit. You train on not being impossible to read and maybe I'll turn up the difficulty level.

Final Ratings

Game play: 7/10 This is a paradox, the game is not fun. Anybody who pays it for more then half an hour will realize it, yet it is more or less the same as the Street Fighter 2 series. I can't really comment on the combo system since I suck at fighting games and can never manage to pull off special moves that are more complicated then Blanca's "hit the one button and turn into electricity after awhile".

Graphics: 10/10

Thunder Dome itself deserves at least a 12

Sound: 2/10

I played the game with the sound off while watching National Lampoon's Thanksgiving Vacation. That movie sucks and makes for a bad soundtrack.

Ninja Turtle Characters: 8/10

It would have gotten a ten if it wasn't for the two characters who aren't part of Ninja Turtles.

Ending: 0/10

I get yelled at enough in real life. I don't need Splinter bitching at me for not playing on hard. I didn't even get to find out who Master Karai is.

Overall: 5/10

This is saddening because anything with Ninja Turtles in it should automatically make me ejaculate all over the room. Hell just seeing April should make me ejaculate all over the room. She is a stone cold fox. This game though is disappointing. It is boring and the computer blocks way to fucking much. Here is a message to everybody who makes video games: don't let the computer block so much that you can never hurt it. That is not fun and makes me angry and then I write a stinging review ten years after the game was made.

Now without further ado, here is what you've all been waiting for:

THE SEXY APRIL O'NEIL PICTURE GALLERY

Look at that cleavage	April going wild on Spring Break
Hot women like to stand next to their own name.	Excuse me while I change my underwear.