TwitterfacebookTumblrMyspace
The Web BtC

Movies that Should be Made with Black People

Blackergeist

I recently watched the movie Poltergeist, and thought that the one black person in the movie looked familiar. Turns out he played Leroy Fisk in the great cinematic gem The Black Fist. In Blackergeist he will be reviving this Oscar winning role, as retired street fighter Leroy Frisk and his family find that their new home in Harlem is being haunted by evil spirits. When his daughter disappears it is the last straw, and he gets her back the only way he knows how, by street fighting every last spirit in that house.

Mickey Mouse: House of Pain

There aren't a lot of opportunities for Black Mice like Mickey in the ghetto. When the Mob offers him a high paying job as a currier he jumps on the opportunity. Problems arise when the Mob tries to control him and they push Mickey too far. He steals a shipment of cocaine, and manages to avoid the Mob long enough to sell it and get out of town. In a new town with a new name he opens a strip club called The House of Mouse. The Mob catch wind of his whereabouts and send a team of trained assassins to make sure his club is destroyed and that nobody survives. Mickey survives the attack but his woman is unable to escape the burning building. Mickey vows to get his revenge, and with the help of his buddy former marine Donald Duck he just might succeed.

The Blacker Ending Story

A boy named Blackstian is chased into a pawn shop by three white bullies. Inside the pawn shop he lifts a magical book. He breaks into the school and proceeds to read the book. It tells an amazing adventure about a land called Blackstasia that is in great danger. The only hope for the land is a young African warrior who sets off on a quest to stop the great and encompassing whiteness. In his adventures the African warrior will journey to the Swamp of Funkness, a pair of gigantic panthers who disintegrate anybody who is not Black enough and to many more amazing places. In the end Blackstian learns an important lesson about himself, and even manages to saves the world.

Klanbusters

The Ku Klux Klan is being sited more and more often in Harlem. Who you gonna call when you see men in white robes in you neighbor hood? The Klanbusters, who use their nuclear powered honky freezing rays to incapacitate the Klansmen so that they can trap them in their cracka containment devices.

Black Frost

Jenmell Frost is lead singer for a funk band. He is constantly traveling with the band, because they have several outstanding warrants, and staying in one place for an extended amount of time will get them caught. Because of this he is unable to spend much time with his illegitimated son Chevelle. Jemmell is killed in a hail of bullets, and comes back one year later as a snowman. They bond, but trouble arises when it starts to get warm.

Hotel Rwanda II: Bigger, Badder, Blacker!!!

Paul Rusesabagina and the rest of the residents of the Hotel Rwanda return to the hotel for a memorial service to honor all those we died in the genocide. Unfortunately genocide starts up and they are once again trapped in the hotel Rwanda. Paul finds out that the genocide is really being perpetrated by whites who want the entire Black race destroyed. He arms those in the hotel, and starts a little genocide of their own, against the whites.

Blackest Man in the World

Bruise Blackbaker is an illiterate Vietnam veteran who runs a youth disco in Compton. It looks like Bruise is going to lose the youth disco when it is discovered that he has never paid taxes in his life. The white mafia is going to buy the building, tear it down and build a racism factory. The only way for Bruise to save the youth disco is to win the Blackest Man in the World contest. With competitions like the fired chicken eating speed run, grape soda high jump, and hoe slap triathlon is won't be easy.

Escape from Harlem

The president's plane has crashed in the blackest town in America, Harlem. The blacks living there have kidnapped him and will not release him until reparations have been paid. It's up to recently captured criminal Black Mamba to sneak into Harlem and kung fu fight his way to the president.

Black News Bears

The Black News Bears are the worst baseball team in inner city Detroit. They lose every game that is until the ghost of Jackie Robinson comes to teach them how to play, and that the real key to winning is friendship. They end up losing the big game, but they get their revenge when they beat up the other team in a massive kung fu battle in the parking lot.

M.V.B.- Most Valuable Blackman

Jamarcus is a Black man who has been the subject of a long-term experiment by Dr. Kendall, a researcher who been teaching Jamarcus to communicate through sign language. Jamarcus, however, has not been making progress fast enough for Dr. Kendall's sponsor, Dr. Peabody, who has cut off his funding and sold Jack to a medical research lab. Afraid of what could happen to his African friend, Dr. Kendall sneaks Jamarcus out of his home in the lab; however, Jamarcus is accidentally sent to Canada, where he gets loose and is discovered by Tara, a deaf girl who recognizes Jamarcus sign language. Jamarcus has an even bigger surprise for Tara's older brother Steven; Jamarcus scrambles onto the ice in the midst of practice for Steven's junior league hockey team, and he and his teammates discover the Black guy has a natural talent for the game. With Jamarcus on the team, Steven's team is on their way to a league championship, but Jack's notoriety attracts the unfortunate attention of Dr. Peabody, who are determined to send Jamarcus back to his new owners.

Blackzilla

A documentary about Shaquille O'Neal's life and career.