"Whisper to a Scream"Season 3 Episode 8
Canadian airdate: November 12th, 2003
Aww shit. This looks like it's going to be an Ellie episode. Ellie's dad is shipping off with the Canadian military, leaving Ellie with her crazy drunk of a mother. This is makes Ellie very sad. Damn you, Ellie, you're dad is going to be fine. It's just a peace keeping mission. Canada doesn't go to war, they just give the enemy whatever they want so they'll go away. It's a good way to get free stuff. Hungary got a new soccer stadium by declaring war on Canada, and I got a new stereo last time I declared war on Canada. I'm going back next summer to get a free Playstation 3.
Meanwhile—fuck, an Ellie A plot and a Terri B plot, what a horrible episode this is going to be. Terri has been getting roses from a secret admirer. A secret admirer with a fat fetish, no doubt.
Paige and Ellie are competing for a internship at Caitlin Ryan's TV station. Paige thinks she has the upper hand with her Lisa Loeb glasses and the fact that she's not a loser Goth. Plus Paige spilled grape juice on Ellie's shirt, which just makes Ellie look like a sloppy dumbass.
Now with that big yellow jacket and red hair, Ellie looks a bit like April O'Neil, the woman who hangs out with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and is a sex goddess. You know, right now I don't hate Ellie as much as kind of want to stick my willy into her girl hole.
Terri is freaked out because Toby keeps talking to her like Hannibal Lector. Terri is worried that Toby is her secret admirer, and even Terri isn't that desperate for love. Actually, Toby is just messing with her, because he is weird and may want to eat her.
Ellie comes home to see her mom drunk off her ass. That combined with the rest of the stress that day brings out Ellie's dark secret: she cuts herself. Normally, that would be sad, but it's kind of funny on Degrassi because Ellie cuts herself with those safety protractors with the blunt ends that are actually designed so you can't cut yourself with them. Ellie must be trying like hell to slice her arm with that thing.
It's kind of a pisser because she doesn't even cut herself right. You want to end it all, you go down the road, not across the street, girl. Fucking kid can't cut herself right and die, like she should.
Caitlin obviously has the same stirrings for April O'Neil I do, and the next day, Ellie beats out Paige for the internship. But the internship only creates more stress for Ellie and she cuts herself more and more. Ellie, why don't you relieve your stress like normal Goths, by writing shitty poetry and listening to the Cure?
Man, look at how disgusting Ellie's arm is. She really managed to do some damage with that safety protractor.
Paige catches Ellie cutting herself. If Ellie wanted to keep this a secret, she shouldn't have done it in the school bathroom, where Paige spends 10 hours each day. Ellie was looking for help, and in a rare instance of kindness, Paige helps Ellie confront her problem and go to counseling. Good Paige.
Well, Toby wasn't Terri's secret admirer. It was really Rick, a new face to the show. Later on, Rick does us all a service by putting Terri into the hospital and off the show, but now he just looks like a creep who likes a lot of bump in the trunk, and gut, and neck.
And with that, Ellie has gone from a whisper to a scream.
Ellie and Terri do not a good episode make. Man I hate them both so much. It was funny thinking about Ellie cutting herself with that blunt protractor, though.
Intensity Level: 44% Intense
Cutting, and not much else. The Terri secret admirer story had no mystery in it because I didn't care. But Toby talking like a cannibal to a fat girl was good for some laughs.