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"Take On Me"

Season 3 Episode 16
Canadian airdate: February 16th, 2004

Boycott the Caf name: "Shitty Breakfast Club episode"
Important characters: Sean, Ellie, Jimmy, Hazel, Toby, Principal Raditch
Issue of the Week: Detention

Degrassi The Next Generation episode fifty three

Hey there, Principal Raditch is decked out, I wonder why. Maybe he has a hot date (unlikely) or maybe he is going to work at his second job at the Vice Squad for the Miami Police Department (more likely).

Degrassi The Next Generation episode fifty three Degrassi The Next Generation episode fifty three Degrassi The Next Generation episode fifty three

It turns out he is just at school to supervise the Saturday detention Sean, Jimmy, Toby, Ellie and Hazel are stuck in. Raditch doesn't actually spend the day supervising the kids, but I'll get into that later.

Man, you are going to hate this episode. It is almost as bad as that shitfest "Holiday." As I understand, this episode is supposed to be inspired by the movie The Breakfast Club, but I have never seen that movie, and never want to see it after having to sit through this poop fest. The problem with it is that nothing really happens the entire show and we're force to sit through Ellie and Toby.

Sean gets so mad at being in this crappy episode, he telepathically makes a ceiling tile fall down on Ellie.

Instead of watching the kids, Raditch goes off to the gym and works out with a giant Swedish exercise ball. I guess Raditch just takes over the school every weekend and makes it his own. I'm seeing a whole new side of Raditch here, and it's a side that shows he should really not be put in charge of a school.

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Left to their own devices, the kids argue and then play a short game of truth or dare. Hazel has to bite bullet since she has been dared to kiss Toby. This may be the first time Toby has ever been kissedóby a girl that is. Toby then brags that this will make JT so jealous. Oh, you know those two are gay for each other.

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Later, everyone plays a game where they try to kill Toby. That's cool.

Degrassi The Next Generation episode fifty three

Mr. Simpson walks in, but he wants no part of this and takes off before he can see enough to make him a witness.

Degrassi The Next Generation episode fifty three

Sean loves himself a good samich.

Degrassi The Next Generation episode fifty three

Oh no! Jimmy just stabbed Toby with a javelin. Not much of a loss for the show there.

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Since it's not like they are going to be at all supervised during this detention, the kids steal the keys that allow them to go up to the roof of the school. There, Jimmy makes out with Hazel while Sean lies down with Ellie. Jimmy gives Hazel a dirty necklace that was just lying on the roof. Man, Hazel has a really big rack. I bet those things squirt out chocolate milk.

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Toby's a loser and doesn't get to hang out with anyone on the roof. Ha ha. Let's all laugh at him for having no friends. He looks down to see Raditch talking to Mr. Simpson. Simpson can't believe what a fascist Raditch is for actually punishing kids who did bad things. That goes against Simpson's philosophy of being a pussy. "C'mon," says Simpson tells Raditch, "you got Jimmy, Hazel and Toby in there." "And Sean," retorts Raditch. I like how neither of them mentioned Ellie. No one gives a shit about her.

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The kids run back to detention before Raditch can catch them roofing it, but Raditch still wants to know who stole the keys to the roof. Jimmy did the crime, but Toby takes the rap so Jimmy will think he is cool. Not gonna happen Toby, you a supa' nerd. Raditch is about the punish everyone even harder by giving them all dentition until they're all 33, even though by that age the kids will be way out of his jurisdiction. But then he takes Simpson's speech to heart and lets the kids go home.

At that point, we make a shocking discovery: Ellie was secretly tape recording the entire day. Now everyone hates her. Sean crushes Ellie's tape recorder with his foot, then does the same to her face.

The next day, the five of then are all friends. What really fucked up is that Sean and Ellie agree to start dating. Man, what was Sean thinking? I'll talk more about this in the next episode review. Right now I'm sick of this one.

Something...something...take on me.

Rating: F
Boring. How about Degrassi actually have an adult who will watch the kids in detention instead of going to the home ec room to bake cookies and sew a pillow? That seems like common sense. Hell, in my school there was always a person who supervised the detentions. Also, the assistant principal had a monitor in his office that had a video feed to the detention room, as well as one to the main hallway and girls bathroom.

Intensity Level: .003% Intense
The kids had no supervision so of course they didn't just sit down in the cafeteria for 8 hours. Instead they go up to the roof. Whatever. That's not intense. They should have ate some fruit to get boners, or gotten Rick to shoot someone, or drank rum and cola in the ravine and then thought about maybe burning down the school. Those were all intense things Spinner did. And where the fuck was Spinner? Nowhere. Fuck this. I know Sean is cool, but that coolness is lowered with Toby and Ellie in the room. That's like an episode of Happy Days that centers on the Fonz and Potsy, or a Full House with Uncle Jesse and Joey.

What Everyone was in Detention For:
Toby and Jimmy: failed attempt to hack the school computer network to change Jimmy's grade. (Seen in "Accidents Will Happen")

Sean: suggested Raditch bend down and blow his own dick. (Seen in "This Charming Man")

Ellie: excessive tardiness.

Hazel: logging onto www.bigblackdicks.com while at school.

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