The Web BtC
Previous Episode Next Episode

"Uptown Girl" Part 2

<-- Part 1

Mia finishes up the sex with the model guy. What are the odds Mia would find the sole heterosexual man in the fashion industry? The guy gives her some money and Mia thinks it's for sleeping with him, but the dude just gave her cab fare because he doesn't want the underage girl he just slept with to walk home alone in the middle of the night. Mia has to leave. After he shot his load into her there is no reason to have Mia stay around.

Mia gets the modeling job. She will be the new face of T Bonds. I guess with the current financial crisis, Canada wants to put a sexy face on their treasury bonds to encourage investment.

It's another day at school. Darcy and her sister go to school together but do not get along very well. They are opposites. You see, Darcy's sister is joining the gifted program and Darcy is a dumbfuck. Darcy teases her sister for wearing a private school uniform in a public school. Lay off, man. Maybe she's the lead guitarist in an all girl AC/DC tribute band. Darcy's sister says she is not interested in boys because she has studying to do. Darcy's sister must be a lesbian. She does connect with this cute butch lesbian girl on the steps.

Salve's sister is also in the gifted program. Salve tells his sister that their parents will kill her if they saw the shoes she is wearing. You can't see the shoes very well. I bet since Salve is Indian or something and those shoes were maybe made in Pakistan so their parents wouldn't approve due to the rivalry between those two countries.

Darcy's sister is mad because the lesbian is sitting in her seat in class. The lesbian started school a week after all these others kids came to Degrassi for the first time so now she is the new girl and all the other kids get to rag on her. We learn the butch lesbian is named Casey, which is interesting because I don't think they've mentioned the names of any other new character. Maybe they did. I'm kind of half paying attention to this episode and half wishing I was doing something else with my life.

The smart kids eat lunch together. There is an open mic thing at the caf so Darcy's sister uses it to sing a Christian hymn, for which she gets pelted by food from the students. That's really mean of the kids, but Degrassi students are all animals. White Webster pulls her off stage using a cane around her neck, luckily not seriously hurting her.

Something tells me another Rick needs to come by and put these punks in their place.

That guy who slept with Mia comes by the school to pick her up in fancy sports car. That impresses the other kids at Degrassi. It really shouldn't because he's a grown man going after a high school student.

That guy and Mia got to a party. I guess it's a party. There are only about five people there and it's a weeknight. Degrassi pulls off something really shitty here: some woman kisses Mia, but they cut away from it really quick and them Mia kisses that guy she slept with earlier and they show that kiss for much longer. That guy kind of looks like a woman, so it's almost a lesbian kiss, but a copout from Degrassi none the less. Then Mia and some other girl from Degrassi--who I guess is also a teenage model--go to leave, but the other woman wants them to stay. That couple really likes to hang out with high school girls and make out with them.

Darcy's sister does not want to eat in the caf after she was attacked that last time. She makes all the nerds eat in the Media Immersion room, but the new principal puts a stop to that. He's kind of scared of these smart kids and doesn't like the idea of them getting together and being around computers...plotting. The smart kids go to lunch in the caf and no one throws food at Darcy's sister, so I guess that plot is resolved.

Hey, you know what is funny? Mia learns that she was all set to get that modeling job right from the start so there was no reason to sleep with that guy. Ha! Mia may be a model, but now she is not friends with Webster and that Asian girl who I think runs Jesus Club. They are upset that she slept with that guy, as if it is any of their fucking business in the first place. Webster and Asian girl tell her to go off with her new friends, the cheerleaders who are impressed that she is a model. I don't think those are Mia's new friends, she was in cheerleading last year, so she's known those girls longer than she's known Webster and Asian girl. Also, who is Webster to think he can picky about his friends? How many guys does Webster have to hang out with in a bathroom stall while holding a penis pump to realize he'll never be cool ever?

Rating: F
Last season blew because it focused on newer characters as many veteran cast members left to pursue and fail at acting careers. Now this new season is going to be almost 100% new people.


One night, Johnny and I had a frank and honest discussion about our feelings towards the show (we have to resolve any arguments before we go to bed because there is no way either of us can go to sleep angry). We felt that Degrassi has reached its prime. It's never actually been a good show, mind you, so it never had much of a prime to be past. The new characters fail to entertain, but we figure that Canada's economy depends too much on Degrassi. If the show were to fail, the government would have to bail them out.

Does It Go There? No
I did like when that Asian girl called Mia "a bad cliche." Man, does that sum up every Degrassi character. This is another great and rare instance of the writers expressing the truth.

What Are The Forum Fags Saying:
Why would they have a girl modeling shoes for football players? This shit doesn't make any sense. I've seen better writing on conditioner bottles than on this show. Also, I hate Billy Joel. - skinny
Previous Episode Next Episode