Degrassi Mailbag #17
From: Orly M
Date: January 4, 2007
I've already sent you one email, and you didn't feature me in the mailbag, so here's another you cunt. I read your shit whenever you decide to get off your virgin ass and update it. It keeps me amused, so keep up the good work. Also, try and squeeze in more fatass Terri jokes. The juggernaut one was/is my favorite. Do this and I can get you more hot, virgin, (legal), highschool girls than you can handle. Ya hear??
- Fuck the muslims
I usually skip emails that are just blind praise, or blind hate, since they aren't interesting and I can't usually think of anything funny to say. This one is both blind hate and blind praise so it's sort of unique. Plus, the ending line made me laugh.
From: Tim L
Date: January 4, 2007
The Degrassi Script rocks my pants off so far. I can't wait for the ending...
I was a little confused at first because Jimmy is both on the field trip and at the school, but then I remembered that Jimmy is from the future. He's probably doing some crazy shit with a time-turner like in Harry Potter. Damn Jimmy and his fake paralysis!
That was totally intentional and stuff, you know, to make fun of Degrassi inconstancies. It definitely was not because Billy only writes articles while he is high on antiperspirant. That would be ludicrous.
From: Olivia E
Date: January 4, 2007
I found your site randomly and i am bored so i thought i'd send you some semihatemail:
First of all SPINNER SUCKS ASS! he is ugly and demented so please get a life and stop obsessing over him. He is not sexy and if I met him i would kill him. it really pisses me off and you can mock me for reading your site in the first place but i really dont care.
Secondly, I think it's pretty ironic that you live in michigan. you just sound like you're from michigan. dont question me.
Thirdly, you are a big loser but it's amusing to see what a dumbass you can be.
That is all.
Why is it ironic that I live in Michigan? Also, if Spinner sucks ass then why do all the ladies in Degrassi try to suck on his ass, as well as his penis? You don't have an answer for that, do you?
Date: January 11, 2007
Hey there. In your "I against I" summary, you refer to Spike as "Snake" a couple of times. Just lt let u know.
You probably just misread. We never make mistakes here.
From: Beth B
Date: January 13, 2007
So basically, I fucking love Degrassi, and I was just wondering where I canget the DVDs? All I've found so far is shitty copies on eBay.
Did you try a store? I hear you can go to those and buy things, even DVDs. They even have stores that specialize in DVDs. Who woulda thunk it?
From: kc m
Date: January 15, 2007
I have a serious question here. What in the hell happens to Terri? I dont like her of course but does she die? Hopefully. Ive never seen the episode. Im pretty sure America is way too ashamed to play it. And the little fuckers on iTunes wont put anything before season four. And that Soulseek site doesn't work. Or maybe its just my computer. Eh. I know you don't do it often but I hope you repley directly to my email. Considering ill probably never find your site again. But either way, you rock. From the first day I saw the show I wanted Liberty to die in an oil tanker set on fire. And Darcy now too. What the hell does she think shes doing, making Spinner holy? Ive been looking forward to him mocking every living thing on the show. Well, now at least we have Sean's violence to keep everyone entertained. And at last, Emma isn't as much of a hippie shit. But if Terri is still alive, why the hell wasn't she anerexic? Or couldn't she have picked up Craig's drug habit? And, no, I don't no why the hell I'm asking you guys this either. Probably because I don't have Canada's email. Meh. Bye then.
Terri is alive. After getting out of the hospital, she started going to a private school because Rick still went to normal Degrassi, and it would be awkward if they walked past each other in the hall. I'm not sure why she hasn't ever hung out with, or even talked to, any of her old friends. Let's just say she is busy with the friends she met in her new school.
And no, I don't know why I even answered your questions since you aren't coming back to the site.
Date: January 16, 2007
In the Whisper to a Scream episode, Ellie cuts herself with a compass, not a protractor. Protractors are those half moon shaped things made from plastic.
I remember buying compasses with a point that was razor sharp and could puncture a hole in steel. Now they make them out of plastic so they're more safe probably because people like Ellie's character found other uses for them or some kid put out his eye.
Just thought I'd let you know.
I love your site. I laugh my ass off every time I read a review! :)
Good call on that one. We here at Boycott the Caff are very anti-Geometry, so we aren't exactly well versed with what all the tools are called. It's still pretty funny that Ellie decided to cut herself with that, as opposed to something designed to cut things.
From: Jazmin R
Date: January 21, 2007
i was just reading your reveiw for "pride" for some reason, & i decided to clarify why dylan was at degrassi. apparently there aren't enough gay guys at college or where ever & he decided after having that chat with marco that high school boys would give him more of an adreneline rush (given that it's illegal, what with the pedophilia & whatnot) so he started hanging out there until he got into marco's pants. this is why i call him the gay predator. i also call him dumb gay jerk, but that's a different story. raditch probably should have made him leave for preying on innocent 15 year old faggots, but raditch is old & not as good a principle as he was back in the day so he decided to let it slide. p.s. jay's such a hottie. & have you noticed what a hot mess emma looks in this episode?
Maybe Raditch didn't realize Dylan was too old for Degrassi. One time I was hanging out with a friend who was still in high school, and we thought it would be funny to go to a dance being held to see if any teachers told me to leave because I had graduated three years ago. Oddly enough, they all either didn't realize who I was, or didn't care that a college student was hanging out at the high school. So Raditch might just not be observant enough to realize that Dylan is 24. He could also just be letting Dylan do whatever he wants out of fear of rape. Yeah, that's probably it.
From: Damali B
Date: January 22, 2007
Hey, guys! Just to let you know, I love you website. I check it religiously and I'm always laughing out loud when reading your stuff. A lot of of what you say is true but definitely not this. I LOVE Taking Back Sunday and they're awesome. Definitely not in the catergory of Craig with his awful singing and playing. The lead singer can actually sing. You should listen to them and Adam (sexy lead singer) is not gay because we have sex on the regular. Oh and I'm a girl.
This email is 100% true except the part about Taking Back Sunday not sucking and the part about it being written by a girl.
From: Regina C
Date: January 25, 2007
just wanted to say that your site is more funny then liberty's weird upper lip. I am a 25 year old gay chick who just discovered the magic that is Degrassi the next generation. my girlfriend and I stay up late and laugh at how Degrassi is like Showgirls, its so bad its good. I pretty much agree with everything you say except how cool spinner is. He has faggy hair and I think will blow Marco before the show gets canned for some shitty Ann of avonlea series. Anyways its pretty much my new favorite show and I have no clue how it took so long for me to find it. Ironically i was all coked out and caught the" what it feels like to be a ghost" episodes. I have never laughed so hard in my life. anyhow that features coke heads, abortions, school shootings, teenage slut bags, and white kids acting black and black kids acting white is cool in my book. I do not understand though how the first Degrassi could be so shitty and then they were able to make a new one a few years later. whatever though.
keep rockin and post more episode synopsis up. I have been reading em for the past 3 hours , they are like crack. fuckin bitchin.
For years, we have made strong attempts to attract the lesbian audience. Nice to see we are finally making progress. Sorry about the lesbian representative on the show being Alex. That's got to be a disappointment. At least Paige use to be a lesbian for a few episodes. That had to be cool for your people, I certainly enjoyed it.
Date: January 25, 2007
in the episode where emma learns to suck weiner, everyone is working on a play. a corny ass nerd play, i might add. there are kids from all walks of life. some tools like nate, jt,and liberty, black people, like liberty jr, hot minors like manny, sluts like amy, dykes like alex, and superstuds like jay. when i was in school- bad asses didnt work on plays. plays are lame, especially high school ones. unless its live porn- then i can see the attraction. jay spends the rest of his day, when not working on plays, in the ravine getting his noodle wet. dont you think with the vast majority of girls wanting to suck his rod that he would have no time to work on the lameass play? is there such a thing as too much of a good thing for jay? also, my favorite slang term for condoms has always been jimmyhats. from now on, i shall only refer to them as spinnerhats, although he probably doesnt use them because condoms are for suckers.
Good luck with Spinnerhats, I'm not sure how often the subject of condoms comes up with your circle of friends, but next time you mention Spinnerhats you'll have an embarrassing explanation to give.
From: Jason R
Date: January 27, 2007
I for one think it was appropriate the way JT was killed off the show. After all, his character has been thrown into bizarre situations for very silly reasons. For example, he got Liberty pregnant because he used a king-size condom on his ding-a-ling. I mean, who actually does that? So now, he dies because he insulted some dude who was peeing on his car. Talk about synchronicity.
What's the next logical step on Degrassi? Paige joins the Army?
When put this way, JT's death makes perfect sense. Nothing that happens to him ever makes sense, so his death should happen as randomly as possible. Really, who gets killed because of a feud one school has with another? Not to mention the whole "peeing on a car thing" was already done on Greg the Bunny.
From: Krystine M
Date: January 27, 2007
I seriously cannot believe that J.T. was killed off I mean yea the commercials advertising the episode kinda gave it away but it took along time to sink in ya know? I was staring at the TV wondering what had just happened...
J.T. was such a great character, he's been there from day 1...the least the writers could have done is let him finish his senior year for crying out loud...Well I'll always miss him and I hope Emma and especially Manny see how stupid thei ridea was bye!
They seriously should have just killed off a minor character. People can be just as upset that Muslim Girl is gone as they are about JT. They could have at least done a better job building it up. Look at the Rick saga. Rick was killed, but that episode, and the ones leading up to it actually made sense, and were all very well done.With JT it just sort of comes out of left field. It's like the writers had half an hour to come up with this season's shocking twist and they went with the first thing they thought of.
Date: January 29, 2007
The first episode
The schemer is obviously the Spinner of School Time Academy. This is way better then some episodes of Degrassi I could name.
I was going to just write this off as being totally lame, like most Degrassi related things on Youtube, but as it turns out the promo is really funny. I haven't had a chance to watch the actual episode, but I bet it's good as well.
From: Damali B
Date: January 30, 2007
Hey you guys. Love your website. I was wondering when you guys were going to post the stuff people sent in for the contest. I especially can't wait to read the degrassi boards entries. I'm thinking about doing that myself, just for the fun of it.
We did that already. Kind of a long time ago actually. You did not win.
From: Tree Fox-on-Dutch <pleasedonteatmyglassesineedthem>
Date: February 1, 2007
So, everybody knows that Degrassi: The Next Generation and Boy Meets World are two of the greatest shows of all tiime They make I Love Lucy look like The Lucy Show. BUT, far more difficult to figure out-- which is the cooler Sean? When it comes down to it, Cameron or Hunter? Sexy homeless kid or...uh...yeah...
I would really appreciate if BTC could weigh in on this. Maybe I have to write a paper about?
Continue to kick ass and thanks,
On the one hand Sean Cameron had his own apartment, which is pretty sweet, but Sean Hunter conned a teacher into letting him move in. Cameron stole Snake's magic laptop, but Hunter made Mr. Feeney's home into a bed and breakfast. Cameron killed a guy, but Hunter blew up a mailbox. Shit, I don't know what I'm doing answer this email, I should have just written an article about this and claimed that I had come up with the idea. Obviously without extensive research no answer can ever be found. Feel free to write a paper about this if you want, but I think I will definitely weigh in on this issue in the future.
Completely unrelated you have by far the best email address ever. Normally I take out people's email address so that they can't be contacted by annoying people who come here but I'm keeping yours in, although I will remove the provider.
Date: February 2, 2007
Do you guys miss JT?
And will one of you marry me?
We will both marry you. Don't worry, we're Mormons so it's perfectly legal. You should also know that under Mormon law we both have to have sex with you at the same time.
From: janay s
Date: February 4, 2007
"Jimmy's dad is there and he is the blackest man alive. His voice is as deep as James Earl Jones, so everything his says sounds like it is coming from Darth Vader, and his skin is the color of night."
WHY ARE YOU DISSING JIMMY'S DAD FOR BEING BLACK??
HE'S BLACK?!?!! NO SHIT! WE KNOW HE'S BLACK YOU DUMBASS. YOU SAY HE'S BLACK LIKE ITS A BAD THING! JAMES EARL JONES? DARTH VADER?! GO SCREW YOURSELF...YOU REDUNDANTFUCK
YOU REMIND ME OF A SHELTERED BRAT!! "UMM DO BLACK PEOPLE WASH THEIR HAIR" "DO YOU GUYS SHOWER?!" FUCK YOU
AND WHAT TICKS ME OFF IS THAT IT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE RECAP, YOU IGNORANT LITTLE WEASEL! GOD I JUST WANNA KICK YOUR ASS. IT WASNT EVEN A BLACK JOKE!! JUST A SMART ASS WISE CRACK ABOUT HIS SKIN. SOMETHING HE HAS NO CONTROL OVER AND SOMETHING HE SHOULDNT HAVE TO CHANGE IF HE WANTED TO.
GOOD JOB YOU FUCKING MORON!
other than that i enjoyed your recaps.
I don't know where you come from, but around these parts being told you sound like James Earl Jones would be considered a compliment. Who doesn't want to sound like Darth Vader? Nobody that's who! As for his skin color being the color of night, that's just an accurate observation. You can't get angry at Billy for getting a little literary on us. What next, you going to get mad at Flannery O‘Connor or Upton Sinclair? There's no need to fly off the handle about this. Hell, if you aren't black, and I doubt you are since you are reading this site, then there is no reason to even be offended.
From: Alexa W
Date: February 7, 2007
I am a new fan of your website for Degrassi. I saw the page that says you guys want to do a commentary track for the show. Well why don't you email to one of the people on the show? I also saw the page where you wrote to Lauren Collins and she wrote back, so you could write to her, and send a link to the page about the commentary tracks or something.
At least get word out, because if you just keep that on your webpage there's very little change for someone from Degrassi to ever see it, whereas if you email it to them directly you might get a response.
Just a thought.
I think it would be more impressive if the fans started an email campaign to get us on a DVD. The Canadian government won't listen to two Yankee yoo-hoos that send them emails, but they will listen to the masses.
From: Daniel B
Date: February 11, 2007
Hey, you guys only caught one of the melons in the episode where JT gets cut like a bitch. In the version of the episode they put up on the-n.com, the melon you screencapped entered the party at about 10:20. The one that I saw was at about 9:45, right after Webster.
I just want you guys to get the full picture here. I think this is sexual innuendo on the part of Degrassi's producers (two melons = boobz). Silly Canadians.
I think it's just a Canadian tradition for Spinner to bring a watermelon or two to parties he attends. The reason he isn't carrying them in this episode is because he found some punks to do the hard work for him. Not that it would be hard for Spinner and his 25 inch pythons. He just feels like making life rougher for those weaker than him.
From: tina w
Date: February 11, 2007
this is the best show ever! i really like the writing and the acting! but can you tell me why terri, craig, and the guy that plays jt decided to leave?
anyways, keep up the good work!
p.s. is there gonna be a 7th season?
I would say that they left to further pursue careers in movies and television, but that would be a lie. Starring in Cyber Mutt and guest starring on Radio Free Rosco do not count as careers in movies and television. Most likely they left because the writers told them they were being kicked off the show. I heard the guy who played Craig didn't even really leave. He sleeps on the set and pretends to be one of the extras so that he can eat in the cafeteria.
Date: February 17, 2007
I was on your degrassi site and I have to say, FUNNIEST thing I've eve read on the show. i thoguht i and a small handful of people were the only ones to make horrible jokes about the show.
I was reading the episode banned in America and I'm extremely pissed my country didn't show it. We tend to have this hypocrisy of "free speech" unless it doesn't agree with the FCC. (Fucking Communist Cunts) That sounded liek one of the best episodes they could've aired too. That would've gotten the best ratings of any episode.
Anyway, loved the site. Keep up the good work.
The FCC only effects broadcast television. It has no effect on the channels that show Degrassi. The N has also recently shown "Accidents Will Happen" so it is no longer the forbidden fruit of the Degrassigarden. Now the only episode not shown in America is the one where Jay and Jason Mewes get high and have sex with a bunch of girls in middle school.
From Jazmin R
Date: February 18, 2007
rice krispy treats taste better when you use frosted flakes instead of rice krispies.
Good to know.
From: radha d
Date: February 22
Wouldn't spinner make a good football player
Of course, he is great at everything he does.
Date: February 24, 2007
You have two letters published from me in one of your mailbags and I only remember sending one of them. That's probably not a good sign. But anyway, I just wanted to say that I hadn't visited the site in a while and I just spent like 6 hours catching up on everything. My lungs hurt I've laughed so much. You guys are awesome. So awesome.
here's some random web boobs (no, not mine) just for fun:
I tried to check out the boobs but this is all I got. It would appear that these boobs are classified, and showing them would be a breach to national security. I don't know if you sent me a picture of the president's boobs or what, but stop it. I've already got homeland security breathing down my neck for the time I was taking a tour in the White House, lit a cigarette, was told smoking was not allowed, and then threw it into a wastebasket, which started a fire. I keep telling them it was an accident but for whatever reason they think I tried to burn down the White House on purpose. Bunch of jerks those guys are. If I wanted to kill the president I would have activated the bomb I had under my shirt.
From: Jason Z
Date: February 27, 2007
As I was stalking through the comic book section at my local Boarder's, searching for Ultimate Spiderman issues, I was horrified to notice some tiny little books with a familiar logo on them.
"Degrassi: eXtra credit".
A motherfucking Degrassi manga series.
I was even more disturbed to notice two seperate volumes. After looking through them, weird things happened in my mind. It was like an acid trip in my head. It is a very weird experience to see comic book versions of Toby and JT whine about the internet. Apparently, one of the stories is about JT getting addicted to internet porn and Toby becoming concerned about it.
Oh Toby, half of your hardrive is porn. And half of that is porn of guys.
What was most disturbing is that thing thing wavered back and forth between American and manga-wanna be art styles. Generally speaking, the boys were all drawn realistically, while the girls looked like they stepped out of a Sailor Moon collection.
A goth Sailor Moon collection in Elle's case.
Also, something weird was going on with Jimmy's head. I dunno. In a lot of panels he almost looked like Mr Potato Head with big lips stuck on. I assume there were several different artists, because in some pages he looked almost human, in others he looked like Jay Leno drawn as a gollywog.
None of the stories revolved around Spinner, by the way - he was in there - though I think they may have drawn him with his original poofy long hair. Marco was in there too, and oddly enough managed to be slightly less gay than three dimensional Marco.
So yes. I demand that somone start buying this and scanning it so that we may all enjoy and be horrified at this shocking new development. You know, if they're going to do a third and fourth one, I'd like them to stop doing generic teen drama stories and just go fucking nuts and be true to the genre.
I'm talking about all the boys getting bitten by radioctive spiders, and all of the girls gaining magical Japanese powers. Then we'd have a fucking reason to really buy the series. Who wouldn't pay for a comic in which Spinner is crawing across some building on Ontario while Page shoots magical beams of light from her boobs while dressed as a sailor?
A dirty fucking Satanist, that's who.
I tell you, they should have sent us these books to review. They sound terribly hilarious, and while I want to read them I would never want to actually purchase one.
After doing a little research on the subject I have come to two conclusions.
1. They probably should have made some of these into actual episodes. They appear to deal with issues, not unlike the classic early seasons. Sure Toby addressing JT's porn addiction could be titled "Calling the Kettle Black" but it is easier to relate to than Craig's cocaine addiction, or Spinner opening a t-shirt store. Another one of the comics is about Liberty dealing with post-partum depression ,which is gross because it has Liberty in it, but could potentially help humans in a similar position. They even have an issue with Ashley being a snob to people after coming back from England. That's a topic that should be addressed because people are always snobs when they come back from another country. I went to Canada for a week and when I returned all I could do was brag to people about how I was in the same nation as Spinner. The description for that last comic rules because it reads "Is her talk of all things British keeping them at a distance...? Or is it her hideous hat?" I like the idea of a hideous hat being a possibility for why people hate her.
2. Nobody working for the comic knows how to draw.
I mean look at that. What the fuck is up with Spinner's neck, is he giraffe man? Marco doesn't fare much better, he looks like some sort of shaved furry. He also appears to have just broken out of jail because look at that fucking manacle on his wrist. He must be stronger than we thought since he apparently tore the chain off of it to get away.
I am going to spare you guys the pictures of Emma. Every time I look at it I feel a small piece of my soul being stolen.
From: Jamie S
Date: February 28, 2007
Have you noticed that Rick looks exactly like DJ's rich boyfriend from Full House?
Actually somebody did once point this out to me.
To end this addition we have a treat. One man, Andrew, decided to send three emails because he thought we should know that he has a fat fetish, and is insane, but could there be a shocking twist? Read on and see…
From: Andrew W
Date: January 18, 2007
No matter what kind of person you think Terri was, she didn't deserve what happened. That's right. She didn't deserve to be in a coma.
All right that's a reasonable point. Sometimes we are a bit harsh, and comas aren't fun for anybody except for the janitors that get to feel up chicks while they are comatized.
Had Andrew only sent this then I wouldn't think anything about it. However then there was the next email.
From: Andrew W
Date: January 18, 2007
(My last lines after Sean decides to stay in Wasaga Beach and says goodbye to Emma whom he stopped Rick from shooting and to all his other friends) Well, there you have it. Sean, at least was able to save one friend from Terri's abusive relationship. ( Cut to all the Season 4 episodes of Degrassi after the episode, Back in Black and all the Season 5 episodes of Degrassi ) On some nights when I can't sleep, I'll watch all the Season 4 episodes of Degrassi after the episode, Back in Black and all the Season 5 episodes of Degrassi and watch all the girls in the show. Sometimes I'll see one that looks like Terri from the back or in the background, and part of me hopes that when she turns around or comes closer, it'll be her again, but I know deep down that that will never happen. ( As I say that, a girl who does look exactly like Terri from the back or in the background turns her head or comes closer to the camera to clearly show she's not.) More importantly, though, I don't view these girls as just abused girlfriends. Each one of them is somebody's best friend. (I turn off the TV and go to bed)
Huh?!? I honestly do not know what Andrew is talking about. I guess rather then watching an episode that actually has Terri in it he likes to watch episodes from after she left the show and pretend there are people in the background who look like her. Then he imagines what their lives must be like. Its odd behavior to say the least, but I guess he's at least not polluting the internet with Terri fan fiction.
Notice how he says when he can't sleep he watches all of season 4 and 5. That's a lot of episodes. When I can't sleep I usually read for 20 minutes. Andrew spend seven hours watching Degrassi episodes searching for people who look like Terri.
From: Andrew W
Date: January 25, 2007
Drama based on a TV show, about a teenage girl, Terri, who inadvertently is sucked into an abusive relationship by her abusive boyfriend, Rick, whom starts abusing her and eventually puts her in a coma. In the aftermath of her coma, Terri transfers to a private school. In Season 4, while trying to get Rick out of Degrassi for good, Terri's friends, Paige and Spinner meet another one of Rick's abused girlfriends, Emma, and begin learning things from her about Rick, plus help her end the relationship and work things out with her best friend, Manny.
No, Degrassi is not a show about Terri. Terri is a 2nd string character at best. She has done very little on the show beside be Rick's girlfriend and help drive a rapist away with the power of rock. Emma was never in an abusive relationship with Rick. She never dated Rick and could probably kick his ass. If anything she abused Rick. Remember the time she locked him out of The Dot? That's the only place in Toronto to get food. He could have starved. There is also no point when anybody learns anything about Rick except that he dies if he gets shot. I wish there were Rick related Revelations. I want to know why his mom sounds like a ghost.
You want to know what is really odd? Andrew Wilson is the same name as an actor, Luke Wilson and Owen Wilson's oldest brother to be specific. He played Beef Supreme in Idiocracy. I guess he mostly has minor roles in movies his brothers make. So the question is what do we have here? A normal man who shares a name with a C-list celebrity, a C-list celebrity (who isn't Kevin Smith) who has an unhealthy fixation with a girl on a high school drama or a person trying to trick me into thinking Andrew Wilson is weird and creepy. I may never learn the real truth, but maybe I'm better off not knowing.