Degrassi Mailbag #20
From: April Atrocity
Subject: Season Seven Premiere You know who the writers are forgetting in these newer episodes? Fucking Tracker in all his shining glory -- it's like he just dropped off the face of the earth. Kinda like Terri, only when he landed (on whatever planet the writers sent him to), he didn't make a crater like her. The first episode of season seven was ehh, alright. I'll tell you how they should have started this season off. Tracker appears magically, as guys like him are wont to do, and instead of going for those no-name chicks we don't give two shits about, he has his eye set on Darcy. She's completely knocked off her feet by his magical manly powers, and kicks that Peter fag to the curb. While Peter's on the ground whining for Sean, Tracker (after beating Peter to within an inch of his life) puts Darcy on his badass bike, and the two go to Manny's house, where the little Latina will be conveniently home alone, and the three of them will have a sweet, sweet threesome. Foursome, if Spinner's in the area. And the B plot'll be something about how nerdy Toby is, maybe he gets caught watching a video of a donkey show or something, and his parents make him watch more bestiality. Or he re-hooks up with Kendra and they watch anime porn together. I don't know -- as long as it has Toby, because as lame as he is -- he needs more air-time. That would've been the perfect season premiere. It's a shame.
From: Janay S
Subject: N/A DOES SPINNER HAVE CANCER OR AIDS??? I WOULD BE SO MADD IF HE DO, CUZ THAT AINíT FAIR. CUZ HE ONE FINE ASS WHITE BOY. IíD LET HIM HIT IT FROM THA BACK. HOLLA AT ME SHAWTY.
Yup, uh huh.
From: Jennifer C
Subject: spinners gay hair cut I watched the commentry for 'time stands still' and from the mouth of spinner himself it was uncovered that the bad bad hair was not his idea. heres how it went; shane kipple was told that he was having a hair change and it was going to be a big suprize. when he went to get the hair change he pointed to a poster of a lame hair cut and sayed "as long as it doesnt look like this one" to wich the stylist responded "it will be much hipper than that". Shane was terribly disspionted.
Date: December 6, 2007
From: MEGHAN S
Subject: N/A Hello! So I've been a fan of the website since it first got started and I love it! I love it so much that I actually did a public speaking assignment on it. Only thing was that i needed to do last minute things. i was going to print out a screenshot of the episode review "our lips are sealed pt 1." and explain the style and format and different things about the review. And I was going to take a screenshot of the article "A guide to spinner's hair" and explain why he is so awesome, but when i typed in the site, it said your account was suspended, that kinda screwed me over in terms of an effective visual aid, how dare you do that?? JUST KIDDINGG, shit happens I know, somewhere the degrassi gods did not want me to have an effective visual aid, maybe someone would have sued me for showing the awesomeness of this banned site at my school. hahaha well I'm glad your sites on, and i will continue to get everyone to witness the greatness that is Boycott the Caf! -Meghan s.
It's too bad our website errors resulted in you flunking out of school.
Subject: Thank You!
I would just like to thank you guys for this website. It is the funniest thing I have come across on the web and it has made my work experience far more enjoyable. I work at a hospital where I sit in front of a computer for 12 hours; sometimes I do actual work, but its rare. I stumbled upon your site via googling "Degrassi" and my life has not been the same since. Because I have so much free time (well, not really free because I'm getting paid...) to dick around online, I have read every episode review and character bio. Subsequently, in the process, I have laughed my ass off, which has been highly inappropriate at times seeing as how I work in a hospital and a general somber environment. I also checked out Dumbbaby, which, no surprise, is also fantastic. All in all I have to say that you boys are comedic geniuses and I look forward to any additions to both boycott the caf and degrassi, because they are just outstandingly hilarious.
I am imagining you laughing out loud at your desk while paramedics are bringing in dead bodies. You must have a really strong union.
From: Joe S
Subject: fuck that shit Spinner's mohawk is gay as fuck. he should cut off terri's head and wear it as a hat.
From: Andrew W
Subject: N/A You guys are acting like Rick's abusing Terri is her fault. Can't you guys see that it's Rick's?
Some things are nobody's fault.
From: Jonathan L
Subject: Marco is super gay Did any hear that the actor playing Marco is actually gay now? If you can say one thing about Canada, they sure know how to cast them.
Subject: N/A Adamo finally came out. (http://www.afterelton.com/people/2008/1/adamoruggiero) It's about time.
From: Kiki H
Subject: The writers love Boycott The Caf!!! On the Degrassi.tv podcast, the writers said that they love your site and read it! (maybe you're right about the whole them hating their jobs thing) ------ Kiki
Maybe we're right? What part of we are never wrong do you not understand?
Subject: Jimmy's forehead I feel like I need to talk to someone about Jimmy's hairline. I don't know where else to turn.
If there is something about Jimmy I don't get, I'll just assume it is a black thing, like how he can be paralyzed after being shot in the kidneys.
From: Jessie R
Subject: Where Sean is after Degrassi Well, it looks like Sean has another hobby besides banging Emma. He's playing a jock in a movie about teenage pregnancy...Probably old news to you guys by now but whatever. Also, love the site keep up the good work.
I've wanted to see Juno for a long time now but haven't had the chance. I don't know if it ever even played in my area. I looked up movie listings online and one theater was playing it, but I'm new to town and when I drove by it appears that this theater doesn't exist. Maybe they play movies in the bakery, I don't know.But I hear Juno is an awesome movie and I want to see it. I especially liked the commercials for it, because even though it's a movie about a pregnant teen girl, the TV spots all featured Michael Cera and Jason Bateman from Arrested Development. So it was basically advertised as Arrested Development: The Movie.
On other Arrested Development. news, I saw an old episode of Sex and the City where Will Arnett played a guy who talked in baby noises while having sex. That GOB right there, I think Sex and the City ripped off an unused Arrested Development script, even though they had been off the air a few years before Arrested Development even started. I have a theory that involves wormholes and shit, but right now I'm going to cook some Mac and Cheese and I don't have time to explain.
From: Anne M
Subject: Boycott the Caf site Dear Boycott the Caf peeps,
Is there any way I can save your whole Boycott the Caf site so its never lost? I think I will seriously cry the day it kicks the bucket. I want it forever! Sincerely,
A Boycott the Caf fan who is your age :o No really, if I can download BTC, that'd be cool.
P.S. You should use my above e-mail as a Mail Bag e-mail, ha! ~Anne M
You can now buy Dumb Baby: The Book wherever unpopular books are sold. You can also buy the brand new Dumb Baby: The Book: One Year Anniversary Edition. There isn't much of a difference between the two versions, but the Anniversary Edition has a three page introduction by Pobar Jenkins as well as a larger font size. It's also fifty dollars more, making it the better deal.
From: Faye A
Subject: That is a racist Black slaves? What are you so type of racists? To say that is just racists and It up set me and I am emailing it to every black person I know. You guies are gone to be more hated than that guy from Seinfeld and that radio guy. Not cool.
There is no way we'll ever be more hated than Patrick Warburton and Doctor Demento. No way, Jose.
From: Laura M
Subject: Character Descriptions I was looking through the character descriptions on your site earlier. I've read them before, but now reading them again I was struck with a thought. Have you considered updating your character descriptions? I was specifically looking through the Candy Bandits section, and it definately seems as though you wrote the descriptions after watching season three. I mean, there's absolutely no mention of Amy coming back from the dead! Simply to get gonorrhea! And I know you guys would have something to say on Alex's lesbianism is you edited her character description. Also, you said in mailbag 19 "I was once banned from a Paige and Alex lesbian forum for suggesting that the two girls should put on a shower show for Spinner. The fuddie duddies at that forum didn't take too kindly to my awesomeness." THAT WAS YOU?!!!?! Hah. I remember that. I was entertained, unlike many of my other friends there. Oh, man. Good times. Love the site. Keep up the good work.
I got a lot of grief at a South of Nowhere forum too. I signed up under the name "iloveteenlesbians" and wrote in my signature about how young lesbians should be able to express their love in public. After a few minutes of browsing I realized this forum was almost all populated by young lesbians. What an interesting turn of events. Turns out lesbians really likes shows about lesbians. They're narcissists that way. Some people complained about my posts but others came in and said "No, she supports teen lesbians, it says it in her name." I was banned after a few days of mischief. I am normally proud of getting banned for message boards, but there were so many lesbians on the board that hardly anyone noticed. Fooey.
From: Kaitlyn C
Subject: N/A Jessie's girl and hungry eyes blew ass and thank you for agreeing. I think Emmas acting has gotten worse with the years, and her "new" characters' nothing different at all she's always been a slut. Jessie's girl made me want that 25 minutes of my life back. Though there were hints that Ellie's pregnant I think shes just turning into a fat booze hound. Put your less important engagements like school and internships aside and put up new reviews asap because we missed you guys. I can't watch any more episodes of this season without funnier witter people than me making commentary. sigh...there's just so much to hate... Emma sucks.
I don't go to school anymore and have never done an internship. I wish I had since internships are a good way to get a good job and I'm scrapping by collecting pop cans and selling my neighbor's heart pills.
From: Hayley A
Subject: I love you. Hey, just a question... what do you have against thirteen year old girls who love Degrassi? I'm thirteen... and I love Degrassi! And I love you too! You and your site make me REALLLLY horny and I want to have sex with you and you can suck my clit and... well you know. XOXO Hayley
This wins the award for most disturbing email, that be sure. I don't know what would be worse, if you really were a 13 year old who just wrote about your whatnots or if you were an older man writing this as a 13 year old girl. Besides the fact that doing what you ask would put me in jail, it's impossible because everyone knows that woman don't grow clitorises until their late seventies.