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Who's the Biggest Slut?

Paige VS Manny VS Emma
Paige Slut   Manny Slut   Emma Slut

Name

Paige

Manny

Emma

Winner: PAIGE

Manny sounds like a man's name, and Emma sounds like the kind of name a small child would have. Paige, however, sounds like the name of a streetwalker.

Appearance

Paige: Shows way too much belly for somebody who is not a belly dancer.

Manny: Dresses like a stripper who is going to a costume party as a prostitute.

Emma: Dresses fairly conservatively, however ever since her boobs grew, she has had a tendency to wear tops that show them off.

Winner: MANNY

While Paige has been wearing belly shirts since day one, Manny upped the ante by not only wearing shirts that show her belly button but also by wearing pants that show off her entire ass.

I also had to factor in the fact that Manny would rather not wear underpants, rather then face the indignity of covering them with her regular pants.

Race

Paige: Canadian

Manny: Spicy Latina

Emma: Canadian

Winner: MANNY

She is a spicy Latina.

Experience

Paige: Has been a slut since day one.

Manny: Took two seasons before she became a slut, and before that she was a very anti-slut.

Emma: Only recently has become a slut.

Winner: PAIGE

Paige became a slut while still in middle school. How many sluts can claim that?

Rumors

Paige: Had sex with a camp counselor.

Manny: No real rumors, though her exploits are well known.

Emma: Got gonorrhea from Jay.

Winner: PAIGE

Having gonorrhea is a worse rumor then sexing up a camp counselor, but it only counts as a rumor if it isn't real.

Relationships

Paige: Gains points for seducing a teacher's aid and then getting him fired. Loses points for having a long term relationship with only one person and hardly ever thinking about cheating. Of course this was Spinner, who is not a normal person, and even a slut like her wouldn't need anything more than him.

Manny: Has broken up two long term relationships.

Emma: Dated Sean, which is nothing to scoff at.

Winner: MANNY

Manny seems to make it her job to break up long term relationships by having sex with one of the members, usually the man.

Relationship with Dean

Paige: Raped.

Manny: May have been raped, though probably was consensual.

Emma: Dean plans on raping her next season, right after he rapes Toby.

Winner: MANNY

Manny wins because she is such a slut that nobody would believe that she could be raped. More then likely anybody that tries to rape her will soon find that she wants sex, thus making rape impossible.

Slutty Consequences

Paige: None that are known

Manny: Pregnant

Emma: Gonorrhea

Winner: EMMA

As Manny shows, you can get rid of a baby, but gonorrhea never leaves, or maybe that's herpes. Either way it keeps Dracula from kissing you during the school play.

Sex with Jay at the Ravine

Paige: Probably but unconfirmed.

Manny: Probably, but unconfirmed.

Emma: Yes

Winner: EMMA

We have documented proof of Emma's sex at the ravine with Jay.

Angry Ex-boyfriend

Paige: Spinner

Manny: J.T.

Emma: Chris

Winner: PAIGE

Spinner is cooler and angrier then J.T. and Chris put together.

Ex-boyfriends with Ruined Lives

Paige: Spinner was soon expelled from school and then almost burned it down.

Manny: With his small penis secret out in the open, J.T. began to date Liberty.

Emma: Chris bad mouthed her in Media Immersion and stopped making appearances on the show.

Winner: MANNY

Nothing is worse then dating Liberty. That is the kind of thing that can haunt him forever. One day J.T. will be running for King of Canada and his opponent will reveal that he once dated Liberty, and J.T. will be lynched.

Relationship with Homosexuals

Paige: Close friends with Marco, and her brother is Dylan.

Manny: Impregnated by Craig, who is in a band with Marco.

Emma: Very little.

Winner: PAIGE

We all know that sluts enjoy being friends with homosexuals, because secretly they hope to convert them. Paige has had the closest relationship with gays; both her brother and one of her friends are gay.

Expertise at Being a Groupie

Paige: Had sex with the drummer of a band.

Manny: Had sex with the lead singer of a band.

Emma: Has not had sex with any band members.

Winner: MANNY

Lead singers are way more desirable then drummers.

Final Score

Paige: 5

MANNY: 6

Emma: 2

No big surprises here, it is well known that Manny is a huge slut and that Paige is almost as big of a slut. It is like Emma is barely even trying; all her points came directly from giving Jay head in the sex van. For shame Emma, you are going to have to slut yourself up a lot more if you want to be more competitive next time.

I now bestow upon Manny the title of Slutatorium.

by Johnny Dangerous